Not too much new today, just the usual five new pictures. As always, you can view the entire collection here. I've got a bitch of a cold, so I've just been sitting at home, trying to find something entertaining on the internet and making some small tweaks to the site. I'm still trying to think of a good .com name to buy in the near future, if you think you have a cool one check out the contest; you could win 20$ for that name.

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You know, I really haven't posted any weird news stories for quite a while. Well, I think it's time to take care of this right here and now!

First off, if you ever get the urge to kill and dismember someone, remember not to lose the penis.

Secondly, if you're planning a vacation to have sex with children in Cambodia, you had better make your airline reservations soon.

Let me take some time to tell you just how cool Yellow Jackets really are. In case you've never heard of this sweet little yellow pill, its like a whole pot of coffee, in a conveniently small capsule. No, actually it's more then that; a few hours after taking just one you feel this enormous rush of energy, like eating a big bowl of pure, uncut caffeine, if such a thing was possible. I've tried just about everything that has caffeine in it, including similar energy pills, but nothing, nothing compares to these. And unlike most drugs, they're completely herbal (and legal!), which is a good thing when you're trying to explain to your parents/significant other at 3:00am why you're hands won't stop shaking. Why the big lecture on Yellow Jackets? Because without them I would probably be sleeping, and not posting these ten new pictures, that's why!

lmao.cjb.net... powered by pills!

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Today I recieved 24 hits from the search engine Google for the words "pictures humping cows." Really. Don't ask me to explain it, I just don't know. If anyone out there is on some kind of quest to see humping cows, please let me know why.

Uh-oh! I'm feeling the need to tinker with the page design again... Stay tuned for some (possible) changes.

Hooray! Proving that boredom is in fact more powerful then laziness, I've finally gotten around to reconfiguring the forum, which has been down for the last several months. I know you have something to say, so go post something. No registration is required.

Once again, five new pictures for you to browse today. I think this is becoming a habit or something. In any case, I still have over 300 unsorted files just sitting around here, so I won't run out of things to post anytime soon.

Also, if you go check out the entire pictures archive, you'll notice I've made a few changes, including making a new category for ads, as well as one for newspaper clippings, which should make it a bit easier for you to find anything specific you're looking for.

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Two links you should check out today. If you're feeling bored you might want to talk to Fred the Webmate, a text-based AI chat thing. Reminds me of the text-based adventure games of my youth, the point of which was to type things such as "fuck the queen" and "masturbate" for hours on end.

All you science students might want to check out the MC Hawking site, which documents Stephen Hawking's little-known career as professional rapper. I'm sure your teachers will be delighted when you bring an mp3 of "Fuck The Creationists" to school.

Five new pics for you today! Check them out below, or view the whole collection here. I still plan to add some more pics and possibly some new movies soon, so come back soon.

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Ever felt like going on a night-long rampage of vandalism, theft, and destruction? Good news, you no longer have to risk heavy fines and jail time, just live vicariously through Udder Destruction, where you can find write-ups and pictures of the stuff bored drunken teenagers do best.

I didn't have enough time to get as much done as I had hoped, but I do have a couple new things for you today. First of all, five new pictures. Click of the links below, or go directly to the archive:

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There's a lot more on the way, I promise. Secondly, there's two new sound clips. Funny stuff; check them out. I still have a bunch of stuff sitting around here, hopefully I'll be able to post some of it this weekend; so check back soon.

If you ever bother reading these news posts, you'll know that occasionally I'll post some funny/weird news items. For those of you who enjoy these types of things, pay a visit to the News of the Weird website. You'll find a huge archive of past News of the Weird colums, each with several condensed "weird news" stories.

First of all, let me give the "mad props" to all the people who have been e-mailing me pictures and such lately. It's cool when people do this, as it means less work for myself. But even when I receive something I don't see fit to post here, I still enjoy hearing from people who visit here.

Anyway, once again I'm looking forward to a nice seventeen hour day with zero hours of sleep. Time to stop at the store and buy some caffine-loaded products this morning, I guess. Today's news post is a little short, but better then nothing. I have a bunch of pictures and a couple of other things sitting in a folder on my PC, but didn't get around to putting them on the site yet. Hopefully I'll have a nice juicy update for you guys by Thursday or so.

I've put up four new hand-picked audio files for your enjoyment. They're all pretty funny, so go check them out!

Looking for some parodies of your favorite movie, song, or multi-million dollar advertising campaigns? If so, check out the brand-new Bastardize.net, which houses a decent amount of links to some of the best ones on the net, including the much-loved movie bastardizations over at Detonate.net.

Stay tuned for a couple of new movies and a bunch of pictures later this week!

New content already? Yes! Check out the six new eBay auctions and find out exactly what a "hopping penis" is.

I'm sure some of you are wondering about the contest. Yes, it is still on. No, I have not forgoten about those of you who sent in an entry. I've gotten a couple of good ones, but am still looking for the "perfect" name. In case you have not heard of it yet, I'll pay you 20$ if you can think up a cool name for this site that is also an availible .com or .net domain. I'll be picking a winner soon, so hurry up and enter!

Looking for something to do this weekend? Why not try some pornographic origami.

If you have any interest in this site you've probably been wondering, where have I been? Where did all the updates go? The truth is, for the past several months I've been on vacation in Vermont, and unfortunatly there were no phone lines in the area where I was staying. My original plan was to buy a cell phone and do updates with my laptop, but due to various reasons (like the fact that Vermont has shitty cellular service) I was unable to do so. I know I should have left a message here just in case, but in the rush to burn my entire MP3 and pr0n collections to CDR, as well as pack for the next six weeks in one night, I just plain forgot. Anyway, the point of all this is I'm back, and hopefully things should soon be back to normal here.

As you can see I've made a few changes to the layout. I plan to get a whole lot of new content up in the next couple of days or so. I may not be able to make regular updates as I have been before, due to school and work taking up excessive amounts of my time, but I do have some great ideas I will be working on soon. Lastly, thanks to all the people who e-mailed me pictures and such while I was away. (even the guy who mailed me the horse blowjob movie, you know who you are.) Keep it up!